The Beginning of Goodbye, Calls Between Frank and Joan
by lovefranksherwood
Summary: Joan has made a decision. It's time to let those she'll miss know. Spoilers through "Adjustment Period."


Joan Burton quickened her pace down the pathway, taking deep breaths to clear her mind and hold back her emotions. Finally reaching Riverfront Park she found the nearest bench, a cold silver metal one, and sank down. She stared out at the water, watching the cargo ships being unloaded across the river and blinking back tears she couldn't stop. Wiping her eyes she pulled out her cell phone.

Frank Sherwood sighed for the umpteenth time and rolled his pillow tighter to support his head at an angle. Heavy rain was on the horizon in Afghanistan and his head was letting him know it. He had been awake for a good many hours. He had decided early on that the rain was a good excuse, not yet ready to acknowledge that what was really keeping him up was last night's ordeal at Outpost Reno. As he leaned his head back to try to relieve the pressure his pillow once again sagged. Deciding enough was enough he made no movement to fix it and remarkably began to snore softly.

A moment later the phone on the trunk next to his bed let out a loud jangling ring, jolting him upright. Wiping at his eyes and trying to ignore his churning stomach he leaned over enough to grabbed his phone. Squinting he made out the number. "Joan?"

"Frank, I…"

"What's wrong? Is Denise okay?" Frank sprang to the side of the bed.

"No, Frank…nothing. Denise is fine." Joan hesitated. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to scare you."

Frank tried to slow his heart. "No…I just…it hasn't been a good night."

Joan frowned. "Did something happen? I thought your unit was heading home."

"Taliban shelled Outpost Reno and then, overran it." Frank paused as the full impact hit him. "The ones who are okay are in the air right now…on their way home."

Joan felt the energy she had left drain out of her. "I hadn't heard."

Frank spoke, only halfway to Joan, the rest of the way to himself. "I went up there. They needed air support. Why didn't I go sooner?" He paused only a moment. "Five dead… sixteen injured."

Joan shook her head. "Don't go there, Frank. You're the brigade commander. Your job is to remain at headquarters, assess the situation and give orders. You did your job. You are not responsible for the attack on those soldiers!"

Frank's voice was a whisper. "Those families…"

Joan became more emphatic. "You have to stop this! Your unit needs a strong leader right now. You grieve for those lives lost, but you let the men know they did their jobs and how proud you are of them. And you stand up straight, knowing you did your job, too!"

"I don't like not being there."

"I know. You want to be shoulder to shoulder with your unit." Joan hoped he was listening. "But, Frank, it doesn't make it any less painful…not being there."

Frank sighed deeply. "I know you're right…I'm okay."

"Are you taking care of yourself? Have you slept tonight…and did you eat today?"

"They served turkey tonight."

"I hope you didn't eat that. Do they know you're allergic?"

"I don't know. I stayed out of the mess and opened an MRE."

"And what about sleep?" Joan gasped and glared at her watch. "I woke you up!"

"I don't think so. My pillow just hasn't been cooperative."

"Frank, we're going to hang up these phones and you're going to clear your mind and rest. That's an order and I still outrank you. Don't make me come over there."

"Joan, I needed to talk to someone and you had a reason for calling."

"It can wait."

"No, it can't."

Joan refused to let herself fall apart. "There is good news." She had to tell someone whose joyous reaction would give her a moment of happiness.

Frank rubbed his temple, creating an instant of relief from the ache. "Well I could certainly use some of that."

"I've been invited to attend war college."

Frank sat up straight and beamed even through the phone. "You'll make General and then we'll count the stars as they add up. And I'll be even more honored to serve with you."

Joan allowed a smile. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves."

"Look at all you've accomplished. This last leg of your journey will be a breeze."

Joan felt tears choke her throat. Her friend was happier and more supportive than her own husband had been. What did that say about her marriage?

"Joan?" Frank quieted. "What's wrong?"

Clasping her hand over her mouth she realized she was crying aloud. "I told the Committee no."

"Roland's going back to Baltimore and you're going with him."

"You know?"

"Family is the only thing that would keep you from this opportunity."

Joan wiped her eyes. "It's time I give Roland what he deserves. I've had my career; it's time for him to have his."

"It couldn't have been an easy decision."

"You helped me make it, you know. Remember what you said- kids aren't with us long enough. I think about Jeremy…and Amanda…and I know there are no guarantees. I don't want to miss one more moment with David and Sarah Elizabeth."

"Joan, I know that's part of it, but…" Frank hoped to let her know it was okay to tell him. "You know it's safe with me."

Joan knew who she could trust. "Roland told me if I accepted the war college invitation that our marriage was over."

Frank felt his stomach drop. "No one should ever use marriage…" He couldn't finish his chastisement of Roland. He was ashamed. "I was like that, Joan. I bullied Denise. I thought I could tell her what to do. It almost ended our marriage."

"But it didn't. The two of you did the hard work it took to move on."

"You're no stranger to hard work. You and Roland will get through this."

Joan stated a fact with no emotion. "I won't have to work on my marriage. I'm simply going to tell Roland I've chosen my family."

"You haven't told him?"

"I'm on my way to tell him. I called him and told him I had made a decision. I just stopped here to clear my head first."

"So you're in Riverfront Park?"

Joan squeezed her phone and took a ragged breath. "Of course you would know that."

Frank felt he had to warn her. "Do the work now, Joan. Don't leave room for resentment to creep in, unnoticed until it's too late."

Joan was desperate to lighten the moment. "Is this really Frank Sherwood talking?"

"It's Frank Sherwood who's screwed up a lot."

"I appreciate you sharing that with me, Frank. I know it's not easy for you."

Frank sought to dodge before feelings weren't squared away. "Have you told General Holden?"

"He keeps asking, but I know how disappointed he's going to be…"

"If anyone understands the importance of family it's him."

"I hope you're right." Joan took a deep breath. "I can't put this off any longer. Roland is going to be wondering what happened to me."

"Roland and your kids will be in Baltimore. That's all you need."

"I can't help wondering if Roland would have left me."

"Roland would be a fool."

"I'm going to miss you, Frank."

"I'm never farther than a phone call."

"It's been an honor and a privilege, Colonel."

"The pleasure's been mine, ma'am."

"I know who I can count on."

"Me, too." And he pushed the button to end the call.


End file.
